Jokes

A Couple's life on Whatsapp and Facebook:

On Whatsapp:
Wife: Ghar Kab Aa Rahe Ho?
Husband: Pata Nahi, Dimaag Mat Khao!

On Facebook:
Wife: Dear, when will you be back? You're the best husband in the world. Miss you, please come back soon.
Husband: Thanks for being there always... so lucky to have a wonderful wife in you. Honey, I'll be back soon!
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"हत्या" और "कत्ल" में क्या फर्क है?

शायद शब्द अलग हैं
लेकिन मतलब एक ही है।

फर्क जानने के लिये नीचे लिखा नुस्खा आजमायें।

ऑफिस से घर पहुँच कर भाभीजी से कहिए कि वह "हत्यारिन" लग रही हैं।  शर्तिया रात का ख़ाना नहीं मिलेगा।

लेकिन अगर आप कहते हैं कि "कातिल" लग रही हैं तो शाम की चाय  पकोड़ों के साथ मिलेगी।

Moral: कृपया शब्दों का प्रयोग बहुत संभल कर करें।
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 Touching words by a Father-

Dear Son,
if you think your Dad, Mom & Teacher are Strict and unnecessarily harassing you.

Wait for your wife!😜
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Wife : I am not talking to you.

Husband : Okay.

Wife : Don't you want to know the reason.

Husband : No, I respect & trust your decision!
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‬: A senior citizen drove his brand new Porche to 100 kmph, looking in his rear view mirror , he saw a police car behind him. He floored it to 140 , then 150 ...then 170 ...
Suddenly, he thought,  I'm too old for this nonsense ! '' So he pulled over to the side of the road and waited for the police car to catch up with him .
The officer walked up to him , looked at his watch and said , ''Sir , my shift ends in ten minutes , Today is Friday and I'm taking off for the weekend , If you can give me a reason that I've never heard before for why you were speeding , I'll let you go ''

The Man looked very seriously at the police man , and replied , '' Years ago , my wife ran off wid a policeman, I thought you were bringing her back , ''

The Cop left saying ''Have a good day, Sir"😆
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‬: Check out your Birth Date......
No Cheating.!!
31- Biggest Kamina.
30- Aadarsh Insaan.
29- Smiling Face Always.
28- Happy Go Lucky.
27- Name Bade Darsan Khote.
26- Intelligent Person.
25- Studious.
24- Can Make Others Jealous.
23- Always Ready To Party.
22- Nautanki.
21- Nalayak.
20- Sharif.
19- D Perfect Person.
18- Bazzigar.
17- Yaaro Ka Yaar.
16- Maa Ka Ladla.
15- Lafdebaz.
14- Can Play With Hearts.
13- Hero.
12- Lucky Person.
11- Smart Inshan.
10- Cutest.
9- Bade Dilwala.
8- Kamchor.
7- Good Person.
6- Caring N Loving.
5- Fattu.
4- Fun Loving.
3- Ajibo Garib.
2- Badmash.
1- Batmiz.
Plz reply wich 1 is urs...?
No Cheating...!!
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‬: Should men have girlfriends after forty?

Genuine answer by Alia Bhatt:
Frankly speaking...No
I think forty girlfriends are more than enough:;
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